Here's to the challenges that change you.....at your core. Where is your resistance?

Some days are easier than others.  Plain and simple.  And this is one of them for me.  But the pulse underneath the surface of that "easier" is more awareness.  Ahh Perspective.  After my impending full moon slumber last night where my legs were literally running races in my sleep, this morning left me tired but with so much energy I thought I was going to self destruct.  Now I don't run mind you.....ever, I could have run a marathon.  Now when I say I don't run I mean that if I was in need of running for my life, I would make it 20 feet and turn around fiercely and say come and get me (kidding of course....sort of).  The coming full moon and Lunar eclipse was like plugging myself into the high power lines by this morning and once I settled my wiggly, restless self down, some really incredible epiphanies started to roll in.  Now bare with me because we are going to be digging into the resistance garden we cultivate for a while here, oh heck who am I kidding, I am largely talking to myself here but that's ok.  I need the pep talk.  What hit me in thinking release....resistance (yes I can even resist releasing), is that 2 other words which relate directly to resistance for me are control, and manipulation.  Not of people, of situations.  Hey I know what I need and what it should look like!  RIGHT!  I teach this stuff all the time, I sing it to the choir but (whine) it is so much harder to take the advice yourself :)  You all think I have it all figured out?  sometimes yes, sometimes no. 

Here are my google labels, or they should be if you search Kim's closet of blech:  Resistance, control, manipulation (of events to my liking) and procrastination.  RCMP and it doesn't mean Royal Canadian Mounted Police!  What's the point you are trying to make Kim?  Well, for me when I resist, what I battle is controlling situations that NEED to happen in order to propel me forward, manipulating at times HOW they happen then procrastinating on the action steps.  You know that implication that if I ignore it then it isn't happening, isn't real, will go away, (insert saying here)?  Bingo. 

So today with all this energy the moon is pelting me with I decided I need movement.  Symbolic really for me.  I never sit so moving is hardly my issue, but movement in my inner sanctuary.  The issues that scream at ear breaking decibels NO and grab the door frame in order not to go through it.  Hey, I can top any preschooler when it comes to fighting being shoved through a doorway!  I had to reach a place this morning where I could say I am willing to stop fighting and directing things so that the natural order of the Universe can work it's magic.  I obviously need to experience the things I am in order to release them, heal them and move out of their town.  Change is good, (however hard my head tries to refute that belief), but growth is better.  Forgive my rambling thoughts, erratic as they may be.  For me it is the thought process that is bringing it all to light.  Who knows, maybe for my 5 fans/followers, it will bring an aha moment for you too. 

Here it is my friends, when we brace our feet refusing to budge on anything is usually when we get yanked by the Universal Tug-o-war rope landing with our faces firmly planted int he mud pit.  Sometimes you have to loosen your stance, allow yourself to be pulled along by the force that you are opposing so strongly and see if the other side of the mud bath is a warmer freedom.  We never know really, if there has been more fertilizer spread over there and the grass is lush and green and soft to our feet.  Just something to think about.  For me I know that on the other side of the LINE I was fighting not to cross, is empowering and beautiful and finally I think, I am really excited to check it out.